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E.U. Farmers' Tractor Protest Spreads to Texazistan

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Comrades, the kolhozniks have nearly paralyzed European traffic arteries (and some European leaders) with fleets of tractors to protest the anti-farm/anti-farmer, anti-food, anti-competition, anti-private ownership, anti-nationalistic, anti-human policies of the European Union of Stochastic Socialist Republics (E.U.S.S.R.).

Their movement is large and growing larger, and now has spread to the U.S.S.A., with a massive protest breaking out in the sleepy little oblast of Texazistan.

IN A SHOW OF SOLIDARITY WITH E.U. FARMERS, tractor drivers circle a pole in the middle of a barren field about 30 miles from the nearest highway (but sort of near Tractor Barn No. 2).

On condition they remain anonymous, both tractor drivers said they are protesting against the removal of beet subsidies, the recent cut in beet rations and "them nosey government revenooers [sic]" who keep sneaking onto their properties and scaring the armadillos and jackalopes.

More as this story develops.

Statistics: Posted by Colonel Obyezyana — 2/3/2024, 11:24 am — Replies 17 — Views 746



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